It has been a busy couple of weeks but I am now back writing some posts. I have noticed that many more people have joined the blog subscription roll since I moved it to a .com domain. And many more people are e-mailing me asking similar questions. I will always reply to any emails, even though it might take me some time to do it due to the large number of people emailing me and work and family commitments.
Having said that, I would like to give out some general pointers that will be useful if you want to move forward:
1- Take responsibility
It is your responsibility to look for ways to get better. Giving this responsibility to someone is not going to work. There are no miracle answers when it comes to rOCD. Just hard work. There are a lot of resources on this blog that will help start with this.
2- Take action
At a certain point you will have to stop thinking and start doing. Seeking for medical advice is a very good start. Seeking for a therapist can sometimes be tricky but it will be very useful. If you can’t afford any of these, look into mindfulness practice. However, this is not a substitute for professional intervention.
3- You have to find the answers for yourself
Many people tell me their story and ask me if I think it is rOCD or just “falling out love”. My experience is that this is something that does not help very much. If I say it is rOCD, there will always going to be “what if’s” this and that. So I kind of stopped answering this question and just try to help people help themselves. A word of caution on this one – most often there is nothing wrong with the relationship but the problem lies with your own anxiety. If you want some clarity of mind, you will have to “fix” your anxiety first.
4- If you want to get better
If you really want to get better do not treat rOCD like flu or measles. That it will go away by itself. From all the people that I have spoken with so far there are always good periods where rOCD appears to disappear but it eventually comes back. You will have to commit yourself to daily change if you really want to see some progress. It is hard to retrain yourself and your brain in the beginning, but it will get a lot easier if you persist.